How low can you go?

I have reached a point in my life where I have very low expectations.  Do you know how I know that?  Because I'm excited about a dishwasher.  You have to understand, I've only had a dishwasher in my life now for eight years.  My father, whom I love dearly, used to say, " I have a dishwasher and her name is Susan."  Needless to say, they didn't get a dishwasher until I moved out.  Through college, and other apartments, only the dishwasher named Susan.  Then I got married.  I thought now it will happen, I won't have to wash dishes anymore by hand.  But it wasn't so.  For the first two years, we did have a dishwasher but to be honest, I barely used it because we didn't eat at our house much.  We ate out most of the time.  If we did eat at home, I worked at nights so my husband did most of the dishes.  Then in our third move, we went to a house that didn't have a dishwasher... and stayed there for seven years.  Seven years, and five kids, and no dishwasher.  AHHH!  And then came the big move.  We moved to a house that already had a dishwasher!  I was extremely excited until I used it for the first few weeks...and realized that I was still basically having to wash every last piece of food off of the dishes before I put them in the dishwasher because it wouldn't get them clean otherwise.  Well, that old dishwasher did all that it could to get my dishes clean, to sanitize them so we wouldn't get sick, to get them dry so we...wouldn't have to dry them(?).  And then one day, it just couldn't do it anymore.  It up and died on me.  Now I'd like to say that I was really sad, and felt huge remorse for all the days when I would basically run it nonstop, but I have to say, I wasn't sad at all!!  I was so ecstatically happy, I could barely stand myself!!  I-was getting-a NEW-dishwasher (picture hands moving up and down).  I got to go and look at all the dishwashers knowing that this time, I got to pick one out for me.  It was an exhilarating experience.  Now I had my mind made up on what kind of dishwasher I wanted.  I went to the store, ordered it and...waited.  I had to wait two weeks for this dishwasher! But then it came.  Now comes the really exciting stuff.  It cleans everything with out having to be "pre-washed"!  It's true!  Every day, I put some new thing in there! Hard baked on stuff.  Dried, crusty stuff.  Gross any kind of stuff.  It's all going in.  And comes out clean!  One day, my husband was doing the dishes, and he was rinsing stuff off!!  I had to say, "What are you doing?!?  You are going to insult my new dishwasher by making it think that we don't believe it can clean these dishes!  TURN THAT WATER OFF!!"  Needless to say, he was a little freaked out by my outburst, but he turned the water off.  So now I have to tell everyone that my dishwasher gets everything off and that I NEVER have to prewash.  And my dishwasher is very proud.

Comments

[Neighbor Jane]

Oh man....next time I fix bbq in the crockpot and let it cook too long I'm bringing my crock pot to your dishwasher. He will feel so proud when he shows me what he can do.